I'm ready for Autumn riding. I am ready for brisk mornings, numb ears, and sweatless upper lips. I just can't get motivated to go out at 7:30 AM and fight soccer moms taking their evil offspring to school (have them ride their bikes or walk 'em to school), hospital workers running late for their shifts, or high school girls driving, texting about how short their shorts are today. You see I am a morning person and this time of year sucks. I wake up at 5:30 AM and I feel like one those old toy cars you wind up, just raring to go and sprung way too tight. I'm ready to go but when I look outside it's Africa dark. That's good for some people but I am blind as a bat when the sun goes down. And I've tried lights too. Two things happen, I get distracted by the lights and it becomes a scene from Goonies. Sloth discovers how to use a flashlight and starts swatting at the beam laughing uncontrolably. Second problem are the little moths that congregate around my Knogs. They must be able to fly pretty fast or else I'm not as fast as I think I am. Again, I get distracted and start giggling like Sloth. That's fine until they come near my face and then I turn into a spazz, swatting and screaming. So no early morning rides for me. I go out at lunch but it feels like I'm playing hooky. I can feel guilty like a superhero, it's a gift.
Poppys Sloth Impression
My only choices are to get over the fact that I am a 140 pound vehicle (bike included, thank you) and I belong on the road just as much as the HMB soccer mom's in their XXL Ford Flex's. Or I can get over the fact that moth's like my headlights and I should embrace those stocky, fuzzy, wannabe butterflies and let them hitch a ride on my slipstream. All the while I hit every pothole my fine city has to offer because my lights only cover one foot in front of my wheel and I have a slow reaction time to things like that. I could also go out at lunch and just live with the guilt, maybe I should start a cyclist confession booth, I bet others feel like me. Probably not. I will figure it out though, it will probably be winter by the time I do, then I can complain about how it's too cold.
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