Saturday, February 19, 2011

How to Use Your Hands Crossing the Finish Line

For all of you getting ready for race season, here are some examples about what to do, and not to do with your hands when you find yourself victorious. Here is an example of what not to do:

On there is video of Mark Cavendish talking about how much he loves his new Di12 electronic shifters. Nothing exciting there. The classic part is when he says how tiny his hands are. I'm not a guy, but I do know that you never want to comment on how small your hands or feet are. I guess if you've got enough confidence to talk about how little your carnie hands are then you probably got the cajones to back 'em up. As seen in above picture. Either way I still think he's a pompous puff tart.

Mark uses his tiny man hands to show that it doesn't matter how small they are it's how you use them. I thought Brits were polite and well behaved, this salute was quite naughty. I wouldn't suggest it.

And then there's good 'ol Tom. Oh dear… Tom, stop it you silly boy, jazz hands are for private time. That's a no for the celebratory spirit fingers and the manel-toe.

Now, here is little Heinrich. Raining, no gloves, in a break-away coming across the line. I cried when I watched him win that stage, and yes I endured teasing from my Mom and husband for it, but at the time it was pure, beautiful sport. The way it should be.

Last years Tour was pretty exciting I'll give you that, pissed me off, but still exciting. My favorite sound bite was Andy saying he had a fire in his belly and was going to seek revenge. Pretty good, but I would of chucked my pump in Al's spokes the next day and then raise my arms victoriously.

This is how a real man crosses the finish line. With a name like Thor how else would you cross the line. Well, maybe he could cross it on the back of a winged giant mongoose, wielding a golden, ruby encrusted sword, and wearing wolf skins but this is pretty good I reckon.

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